Slacker

Yup, that's me I am a total slacker. Y'all need to demand that I get my butt out here and write! Man, I am a slacker.
So, I am horrified to admit that I am becoming one of "them". I haven't succumbed to showing my private parts like mr Peen or velcro wallet guy and I never will. But, I have become some of the others. This morning I look down and see that I have dried brown something on the front of my jacket. Mother effer. I tried to hide it but I dont think I did a good job.
Real quick tangent - it sucks trying to type this post on my iPhone: seriously I should leave the effing typos in so you can see what I gO thru. I'm sacrificing for you - don't say I never did anything for you.
I'm also starting to get paranoid since people stare at me a lot. I think there are bats in the batcave although I'm very careful about that. And don't give me the bullshit about its because I'm hot or beautiful...whatever. I'm sure Heather will come over and kick my ass now. Ok I'm sick of typing on this thing and it's pissing me off.
Love ya, peace out.